Grumpy hotel guest: Things guaranteed to annoy me

Generally I like staying in hotels, B&B’s or private accommodations as this means going away somewhere. During my over 20-year long career of travelling  independently, I’ve seen better and worse and I’ve developed my own likes and dislikes. You may call me fussy or spoiled, but these things are guaranteed to annoy me:

Shower curtains – When it comes to hotels I prefer to live in oblivion of the countless guests sleeping in the same bed and using the same toilet as me. It’s a fact I choose to ignore for the sake of my love of travelling. But there’s nothing that jolts me back to reality faster than a simple shower curtain.  The one that sticks to your thighs as soon as you open the faucet. Have you ever wondered how (if ever) they clean those curtains? I have, numerous times, and that’s why the only thing going through my mind while I’m showering is whether the person before me had some contagious skin disease. Seriously, with all the sanitation and hygiene craziness out there: how is this still a thing?

Hair dryers – I’m not sure whether it is due to some hotel safety regulations, bad planning, or just the fact that whoever is in charge of equipment purchasing is simply bald. But a good hair dryer is so hard to come by that I started to remember different hotel rooms based on the fact if I was able to do my hair or not. During my many hotel stays I’ve learned that there are almost limitless possibilities to make it wrong. Here are just three most common ones:

  • A wall mounted dryer that doesn’t work unless you hold the ON button – As if I would otherwise use it to warm up the bed or defrost the mini bar freezer. And then take it home with me when I leave.
  • A compact foldable dryer that produces more noise than hot air – After ten minutes my hair is still damp, but the dryer heated up so much that it’s impossible to hold. This only means another bad hair ponytail day, luckily I always have my rubber bands at hand.
  • A perfectly decent dryer without a normal socket to plug it into – It’s difficult enough to do something with my hair in perfect conditions. Standing in the corner of the bedroom next to the only available socket but without a mirror to look into does not help the whole process.

No teapots at breakfast – Correct me if I’m wrong but unless the hotel is in the middle of the desert, the main cost of tea at breakfast is the actual tea in the bag, not the water you soak the bag in, right? So why is it so hard to put out some tea pots at breakfast buffet is beyond me. Instead all I’m left with is a tiny coffee cup and the stupid hot drinks dispenser that pours water only two-thirds full. I need to make a new cup of tea (with a new teabag) before I’ve even started eating. So much about an unforgettable guest experience.

Is there a way to make it up to me?

If you are a hotel owner or manager and are aware of all three flaws in your hotel you can still make it up to me. Just make sure you provide good fried eggs for breakfast, preferably fried to order right in front of me. Add some nice lounge or jazz music in the background and we’re good again. See? I’m not that demanding after all.